Sunday, August 31, 2008

Political Smackdown

I'm so excited for the vice presidential debates that I think I'm giddy. Thrice Chairman of the Foreign Relations Committee vs some person whose Fox News believe is qualified on foreign policy because her state is near Russia? Six term senator vs a governor whose barely completing her second year? I feel like the Republican team isn't even trying at this point with her nomination. Sarah Palin better have a major ace up her sleeve and it better not be the fact that she's a woman. I wonder if she's been cramming information for the debates like a college kid right before finals? This will be fun.

Also, has it come to the point where anyone can run for state governor and win? It doesn't even seem like a position of much status. California bit it in the ass when Arnold got elected, after Gary Coleman and some porn star tried for it. Jerry Springer attempted Ohio, and lovely Minnesota had the honor of Jesse Ventura.

We might as well throw all of our names into a giant top hat and pick from there. It'd the same outcome. And if you're lucky, you might even get picked by the Republican party to be VP, or maybe one of those unknown Secretaries, like Labor or Agriculture.

Saturday, August 16, 2008

On second thought...

...my roommate from freshman year of college was a bit kooky. I mean, she never sexed me out because the idea of sex would have rendered her into saying fifty Hail Mary's or left her used underwear in my hamper because she was a bit of a neat-freak, but she was a bit...off. I don't know why I'm recollecting this memory but I am. So deal. I remember coming home one day to an empty room, and thought nothing of it until two hours later when I notice her computer monitor on the floor by her bed. Then came the sound of quiet keyboard typing. FROM UNDER HER BED.

No Joke.

So glad I didn't take a shower that day and decided to just toss my towel off when I returned to my room. So. Glad.

And is mouthwash supposed to burn so much after gargling or am I just dirty?

Sunday, August 10, 2008

Vietnam is the new black

Apparently, Vietnam is the new Russia, in regards to the "mail order brides" aspect. Can it be considered a greater good thing, or incredibly high-priced, long term call girl scenario? For some Vietnamese women, they received their Pretty Woman ending, except sans the diamond necklace and more of the good bye rice paddies. But what a gamble to take, that I'm glad I haven't been promised off to some random son of some old friend of the family. Yet.

Saturday, August 02, 2008

Danger Will Robinson!

Same patterns are starting to emerge, not good. I'm so ready to hop, skip, and be a long jump away from the proverbial pedestal. Hit the ground running, here I go.

On the drive home from an outing last night: "Holy fuck, it's daylight."

I don't remember ever saying those words except when pulling an all nighter and praying to every god possible that I'd get my term paper due by the a.m. deadline. I'm good with not repeating those words again. Unless JK Rowling decided to write a sequel to Harry Potter and I, naturally, read the book in one sitting.

Flight to Europe bought yesterday, the wallet sobbed when I pressed "Confirm" to buy the ticket. Is it October yet? Here's hoping Dublin, Prague, and Vienna don't hypnotize me to the point where I somehow "lose" my passport and am forced to spend the rest of my life in one of the aforementioned havens.